"He's really a nice guy at heart."
Words all too familiar to woman-kind, often followed by "relationships are hard" and "when it's good, it's really good" but is this really how we should view love?
Do we, or do we not deserve more than an okay relationship?
In today's world, it seems that we are forever falling for the wrong guy; too protective, too distant, too emotionally unavailable. What ever happened to Mr. Right? Did he get abducted in the night? Or should women just learn to accept that we should settle for what's in front of us?
It seems that the more intolerable relationships get, the higher the expectations of the person on the loosing side of this viscous tennis game of dating, and so onto match two.
Until recently, I had never heard of a relationship that was easy or simple or even working. But turns out there just might be light at the end of the tunnel.
Three years ago at an underage party tucked away in a small hamlet in Cornwall, two people met. Three years later and I'm having a conversation with my friend who has just finished telling me about all the reasons his relationship is the best. Breakfast in bed, day trips out on his boat and beautiful evening meals cooked and enjoyed together, totally ignorant of the fact that any so-called normal couple would have had a raging argument over how long the pasta should be left to boil.
I'm not saying all relationships are perfect. But when did it become okay to defend the other half for being a total arsehole, simply because "he's a really nice guy at heart"?
I'm being sexist of course. It works both ways; otherwise it wouldn't be a relationship.
Two years ago at a local town festival, two people met. Two years, countless break-ups and several interventions later is it really worth holding onto a failing relationship, just because of a fear that you've wasted the past two years? Or that you're too scared to be alone?
They say you accept the love you think you deserve, and it's possible that if you've only ever known the kind of love that needs defending or that is hard and painful, then maybe it's hard to believe that there's a better world out there.
Being single is hard and painful.
Dating is hard and painful.
Long term relationships are hard and painful.
Jeez, can we take a time out please?! I'm craving a twenty pack of Marbs and the largest tub of Ben and Jerry's I can find just thinking about it.
Three months ago, a guy approached a girl working on a stall and asked to take her out on a date. He swooped her off her feet, they fell deeply in love and it was easy and simple, despite never having known such simplicity in the past. Three months down the line and love is still easy and simple and who know's what the future brings; university, a touring band about to make the big time, but so far so amazing. Can I get a little optimism over here?!
Sadly, you'll all want to hate me when I say that this is my relationship. No one's perfect, and there will be bumps in the road. But it's fucked up that a so-called love between two people should revolve around covering up the faults the other person has.
It's as if, in a desperate bid to keep hold of a sinking ship, a perfect persona of you're not-so-perfect boyfriend/girlfriend is created in your mind as a coping mechanism during the "rough patches" even if this perfect persona ran out the door after the honeymoon period was over. Maybe that memory of how that person used to be was only ever a cover up to impress you. So stop defending the arsehole.
Stop being is a defendership, and start being in a relationship.
And failing that, tell them to get stuffed. No time has been wasted when you're young and you've learned from your experience.
Life's too long to settle for second best.
Peace Out ♥
Words all too familiar to woman-kind, often followed by "relationships are hard" and "when it's good, it's really good" but is this really how we should view love?
Do we, or do we not deserve more than an okay relationship?
In today's world, it seems that we are forever falling for the wrong guy; too protective, too distant, too emotionally unavailable. What ever happened to Mr. Right? Did he get abducted in the night? Or should women just learn to accept that we should settle for what's in front of us?
It seems that the more intolerable relationships get, the higher the expectations of the person on the loosing side of this viscous tennis game of dating, and so onto match two.
Until recently, I had never heard of a relationship that was easy or simple or even working. But turns out there just might be light at the end of the tunnel.
Three years ago at an underage party tucked away in a small hamlet in Cornwall, two people met. Three years later and I'm having a conversation with my friend who has just finished telling me about all the reasons his relationship is the best. Breakfast in bed, day trips out on his boat and beautiful evening meals cooked and enjoyed together, totally ignorant of the fact that any so-called normal couple would have had a raging argument over how long the pasta should be left to boil.
I'm not saying all relationships are perfect. But when did it become okay to defend the other half for being a total arsehole, simply because "he's a really nice guy at heart"?
I'm being sexist of course. It works both ways; otherwise it wouldn't be a relationship.
Two years ago at a local town festival, two people met. Two years, countless break-ups and several interventions later is it really worth holding onto a failing relationship, just because of a fear that you've wasted the past two years? Or that you're too scared to be alone?
They say you accept the love you think you deserve, and it's possible that if you've only ever known the kind of love that needs defending or that is hard and painful, then maybe it's hard to believe that there's a better world out there.
Being single is hard and painful.
Dating is hard and painful.
Long term relationships are hard and painful.
Jeez, can we take a time out please?! I'm craving a twenty pack of Marbs and the largest tub of Ben and Jerry's I can find just thinking about it.
Three months ago, a guy approached a girl working on a stall and asked to take her out on a date. He swooped her off her feet, they fell deeply in love and it was easy and simple, despite never having known such simplicity in the past. Three months down the line and love is still easy and simple and who know's what the future brings; university, a touring band about to make the big time, but so far so amazing. Can I get a little optimism over here?!
Sadly, you'll all want to hate me when I say that this is my relationship. No one's perfect, and there will be bumps in the road. But it's fucked up that a so-called love between two people should revolve around covering up the faults the other person has.
It's as if, in a desperate bid to keep hold of a sinking ship, a perfect persona of you're not-so-perfect boyfriend/girlfriend is created in your mind as a coping mechanism during the "rough patches" even if this perfect persona ran out the door after the honeymoon period was over. Maybe that memory of how that person used to be was only ever a cover up to impress you. So stop defending the arsehole.
Stop being is a defendership, and start being in a relationship.
And failing that, tell them to get stuffed. No time has been wasted when you're young and you've learned from your experience.
Life's too long to settle for second best.
Peace Out ♥
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